Death is wrong!

“I’m finding it hard to breath lately” she said.

How do you continue to breath after such a big part of your life….. is gone? When someone you love dies it seems so wrong that your heart just keeps on beating.

 I remember the morning my dad died. As we drove home from the hospital the sun was coming up and I was shocked…. shocked that the world was continuing to turn after the death of my rock the night before.

Why is death so shocking to us? Why does it leave us spinning and reeling and grasping for stable ground when it’s the most stable thing in this world. Death is the most consistent occurrence in human lives throughout history.

 It’s a promise for each of us until the coming of the King.

 There will be one generation that will not experience death but except for them everyone has the promise of its visit.

 You would think that we would have gotten used to this by now. You would think that after thousands of years of death we would understand it a little better and come to terms with it at least a little bit more but no… death leaves everyone shocked, utterly broken with its sense of wrongness.

Death is wrong!

 It’s not supposed to be this way. If you simply read the first three chapters of Genesis you see that it was really not part of Gods plan. And that’s why it feels so wrong, that’s why we still don’t get it, we still don’t understand with every fiber of our being why someone had to die.

It was not meant for us.

We chose to fall.

We chose to receive the knowledge of good and evil.

We chose to know death.

We made something that was so right, so wrong. We told perfect love, “you are not enough!”. And now we have what we so desired. We have the world that we wanted.

Oh… this is not what you want?

You don’t want children dying of hunger, and disease plaguing thousands. You don’t like the idea of children being orphaned and dismembered by machetes?

You don’t want death?

Ok, but what about your white lies and your gossip? Yeah those are not so bad right? After all, we all have to make eachother happy. What about your self praise and your vanity, it’s ok to have a little pride right? What about control, I mean everyone wants to be in control of their own life. Really you should be able to have everything you need to be comfortable. You shouldn’t have to sacrifice. That’s totally normal and ok. It’s ok to be your own master… to be King.

….but then Jesus is not King.

But then, you and death reign.

We cannot have one without the other. King Self equals death, equals murder.

“But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust. Then when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is accomplished, it brings forth death.” James 1:14-15

But King Jesus….

King Jesus gives us a second chance. Just as impossible as the reversal of death is a second chance at life

and King Jesus provides.

But now, this is what the Lord says—
  
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
    I have summoned you by name; you are mine.
When you pass through the waters,
    I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
    they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
    you will not be burned;
    the flames will not set you ablaze.
 For I am the Lord your God,
    the Holy One, your Savior;
 Since you are precious and honored in my sight,
    and because I love you,
 Do not be afraid, for I am with you;
I will say to the north, ‘Give them up!’
    and to the south, ‘Do not hold them back.’
Bring my sons from afar
    and my daughters from the ends of the earth—
everyone who is called by my name,
    whom I created for my glory,
    whom I formed and made.”

 Lead out those who have eyes but are blind,
    who have ears but are deaf.
 “You are my witnesses,” declares the Lord,
    “and my servant whom I have chosen,
so that you may know and believe me
    and understand that I am he.
Before me no god was formed,
    nor will there be one after me.
 I, even I, am the Lord,
    and apart from me there is no savior.
 I have revealed and saved and proclaimed—
You are my witnesses,” declares the Lord, “that I am God.
     Yes, and from ancient days I am he.
No one can deliver out of my hand.
    When I act, who can reverse it?”

 This is what the Lord says—
  I am the Lord, your Holy One,
    Israel’s Creator, your King.”

This is what the Lord says—
    he who made a way through the sea,
    a path through the mighty waters,
 “Forget the former things;
    do not dwell on the past.
 See, I am doing a new thing!
    Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
I am making a way in the wilderness
    and streams in the wasteland.
 The wild animals honor me,
because I provide water in the wilderness
    and streams in the wasteland,
to give drink to my people, my chosen,
     the people I formed for myself
    that they may proclaim my praise.

But you have burdened me with your sins
    and wearied me with your offenses.

 “I, even I, am he who blots out
    your transgressions, for my own sake,
    and remembers your sins no more.

He remembers our sins no more. He is doing a new thing, a thing without death, a thing to overcome it.

Oh let Him have His way.

Give up your way,

trade death for life. Proclaim Jesus as King!

Where He is King there is no death, there is no suffering there is no murder or illness. Where Jesus is King there is only light and it’s brighter than the sun. It is the Son. His purity is blinding and bleaching, cleaning every crevice of the soul and body. He is making us new. He is making us new by His glorious light.

Oh that we might live in a world where death is a lie,

where death is just not true,

Death is not understood……. because it was never meant to be.

 Thank God for Jesus! Thank God that he sent his Son to right our wrongs, to change history and abolish hideous death.

 Then I saw “a new heaven and a new earth,” for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea.  I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband.  And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Look! God’s dwelling place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. ‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” Rev 21:1-5

This was the sky the morning my dad went to heaven.

Let go the reigns and let Him reign

Warning extremely controversial!

I just want to warn anyone who is reading this that you are more than likely going to be offended by this blog post. I pray that my words are clear, true and wisdom filled; I pray you understand and that I communicate well.

This is something I have wanted to say for a while now. I have said it to some and I fear I have failed in explaining my whole meaning. So here is my main point, God has something to teach you through birth. God has something special to say to you through becoming more like Him, through becoming a parent, becoming a mom. I know this is true because God has something to teach you in every part of your life, why would it be any different with bringing your child into this world? The other point I want to make is that anything worth doing is usually difficult, it’s usually hard and often there is pain. This is true in marriage, running, education, child rearing, really all relationships. Anything worth doing, that has value is usually hard. Now please don’t misunderstand me. I’m not about to start saying that all medical intervention in birth is wrong and sinful and you should fly out to the amazon and give birth in a river. No, not about to say that at all. I am however challenging your grip on the reigns of your life. I’m challenging your level of control that you think you have over your health, your body and you child’s body. I’m challenging your walk with Jesus. If you believe what scripture tells us, you know that you have no control over these things, and that it’s not actually a good thing for you to be in control. Every part of your walk with Christ is about giving up the reigns, handing over the control to Jesus, saying “not my will but yours be done Jesus”. I’m saying, what an opportunity we have as women, through the birth of our children to say to God, “you can have this too Jesus! This child is yours and this body of mine is yours for the taking, do with me as you will Lord!”  What a statement that would be, if we gave God the reigns in one of the scariest, painful moments of our lives. Now don’t miss my point. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t get an epidural or a c-section. I am saying that the bible tells us, “Whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through Him to God the Father.” (Col 3:17)  Do EVERYTHING in order to glorify God! So in preparation for one of the most important things you will do physically in life, ask God for wisdom in how He wants you to birth. What is the safest way, the most God glorifying way for you to give birth? Ask and research what is the best thing for your baby, and chose to sacrifice for them. Persue the best and if complications arise, alter your course, let wisdom guide you. Pray about each decision. Chose to endure pain if that is the best way, the way that Christ endured the greatest pain for all of His children.

1 Cor 10:23,24 "”I have the right to do anything," you say--but not everything is beneficial. "I have the right to do anything"--but not everything is constructive. No one should seek their own good, but the good of others.”

This is not a requirement as a Christian woman, it’s an opportunity. It’s an opportunity for you to give God a chance to show you something that He wouldn’t have without you giving up the reigns. You may even be someone who feels very strongly about a natural birth and God wants to teach you through you needing a c-section or an epidural for the safety of you or your baby. God has something to teach you through birth. What does God have to teach you through pain? What does God have to teach you through giving up “your way”, through physical sacrifice for another, for your child?

You have a right to give birth however you want. You have the right to pain medication and an elective c-section, induction, water birth or home birth but what does God want for your birth? Give Him this precious moment and let Him show you how wonderful a teacher He is. I promise you will be blessed by it.

Isaiah 48:17

Thus says the LORD, your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel, "I am the LORD your God, who teaches you to profit, Who leads you in the way you should go.

On a side note I would like to offer it up that I am preaching this to myself in this moment, not just to you. I am currently facing a pregnancy that carries with it higher risks and may require a different birth plan than what I would wish, but I know that my Lord has something to teach me through this awesome blessing. He has a plan that is so much better than mine. I won't be missing out on it. Trust Him with me, in all things, so that He might know us when we come into His courts.

Joy in it all

I want to talk about something rare, something that has only been truly revealed to me, to my heart, in recent days. There are Christian phrases that you hear all the time, said with impotence and ignorance and in that they are stripped of their meaning, Satan takes ground. But there are deep truths that are so simple they blow your mind, they cannot be understood through words, only experience. And oh, oh how you are blessed if you understand the common Christian phrase, “Christ is enough”. As the natural man we seek pleasure, our own self gratification, it’s a hunger. We have an appetite for leisure. Since we are separated from God in our natural state we seek to fill that hunger every day. We long for praise, for peace and affection.  Since these things in their true form are of great value, rarity and often take work and energy on our parts, we seek out the fast food versions; physical pleasure taking form in many ways, food, sex, self praise, money. The belly of our soul is filled and stretched with not food but garbage, plastic, dry bleached flour  and when it’s been digested quickly we are left with an even bigger appetite than before, needing more food, sex, and self praise to satisfy. And then what happens when sorrows come? What happens when your are living on garbage, on filler and your mom dies or your child is hit by a car? Then, self pleasure is lost, seen for what it is, a veil to blind the eyes from the truth that this world is dead and dying and full of sickness and disease, it CANNOT satisfy. And there it is, the truth that comes just before salvation or deep destruction. This world cannot satisfy. It either leads you to the cross and your knees or to the alter of Satan where you sacrifice yourself and everything you care about. Even as a Christian you have to learn this, you have to come to realize that this world is not enough to satisfy your soul and you are either ruined or reunited with Jesus. I think this is where a big choice is made. In the face of suffering, when there is no explanation for what you are enduring you have a choice to make. You can either trust that what God says about Himself is true,

“but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him shall never thirst; but the water that I will give him will become in him a well of water springing up to eternal life." Jn4:14.

 that Jesus is enough…. or you chose bitterness, indulgence, death for yourself. You say, “God you are not enough either! This world is not enough and God you are not enough for this wound that I have, it’s your fault that I am here and I hate you.” And Satan gains ground. But oh if you chose to trust in the redeemer of your soul! If you chose to believe Him, He will make it true in your heart, that He is enough. And then a really crazy thing starts happening, you start rejoicing in your sufferings. You start looking for oppression in your life so that you can ask Jesus, “Lord please reveal to me what you are trying to teach me in this. I want to know you more, I want to know you in and through my suffering.” I’m beginning to believe that’s actually the only way we can truly know Jesus is in our suffering. So when you see the promise of heaven more clearly than the promise of Vogue or Play Boy you stop seeking the pleasure of this world. Jesus turns you inside out and you start seeking the trials, for that’s where the true joy, the true pleasure is, in knowing the heart of Jesus. He was the man of sorrow. You cannot know Him until you hurt for what He hurts for.

 You will know when this change has happened. You will know when you have made the right choice because you start saying, “Come Lord! Come with your afflictions, with your blessings of wounds that cannot heal, that bind my wandering heart to thee! Bless me with what the world calls a curse and sustain me through it so that YOUR name might be praised. Put me under the dirt and give me praises to sing in the grave yard of my family. Let me sing for joy at the graveside of my father. Let me walk in worship as the lives of my children hang in the balance, as I am in pain and sickness for the glory of your great name, that I might know you when I come into your courts, that you might recognize me, for we shared so many tears together, so many hurts brought us both sorrow. Lord let me know you in my suffering for YOU oh Lord can only satisfy” . And He does, He does satisfy. Not only does he bless you for your tears but He fills that empty stomach of your soul with joy, with singing, with hands raised and waving over lips that move but make no sound for being paralyzed by peace and assurance because Christ in enough. Christ is enough, hallelujah Christ is enough. 

Bear Trap

God scares me. I trust Him and believe His plans are for good but His plan still scares me. This is an appropriate fear for in the first chapter of James we see that we will have trials. This is not a maybe situation, it’s a guarantee. “but God is good and you can trust Him!” some say. This is very true but most often said in naivety of it’s full meaning. God is good. He is about His glory and if you chose to be on His side this means ultimate glorification of yourself as well…. ultimate. God makes us no promise of health and healing in this lifetime. Welcome to Christianity 101, point one: This is gonna hurt. Yes I know that’s not the end of the story but it’s pretty much all we are experiencing right now. We are guaranteed trials and then told to count those trials as joy. “Here, you get to have cancer, aren’t you excited?!”  Or worse, “Here your kid gets to have cancer, doesn’t that make you so joyful?!” Why would we count that as joy? Our response to hideous circumstances… joy? It doesn’t make sense…. unless you know the end of the story. And this is why reading God’s word is so very important. Your going to be lost in utter despair unless you know and tell yourself every day.  “ though our outer self is decaying, yet our inner self is being renewed day by day. For momentary, light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison, while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen; for the things which are seen are temporal, but the things which are not seen are eternal.” 2 Cor 4:16-18 Your going to be crying on the floor, lost and hopeless unless you know in your heart that Jesus said many times in scripture and in Rev 21:5 "Behold, I am making all things new." You just aren’t going make it, walking around with a fake smile if you don’t see 2 Cor 5:17 Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come.

You have to know the end of the story. God wins, He puts death to death, all things are made new!  I don’t know how one lives a single day without thinking about these promises. This world is too dark, it’s too dead and diseased for us to see any hope without wise words that lead us to understanding. We have jumped into a bear trap, twelve feet deep with spikes at the bottom. Here we lay, broken bones sticking out of the skin, blood everywhere screaming for help. God is here separating us from the spikes, tearing our flesh away to free us. Someday we will be lifted from this pit and we will be given new bodies but for now God is doing the bloody work of hurting us, to free us …..and it’s terrifying. “No God just leave that stake in my arm, it’s gonna hurt too bad to free my arm from the bear trap!!!”  I’m afraid of what it will take to set me free and to make my heart new. It’s going to hurt. But I know the end of the story. I know that these light momentary afflictions lead to an eternity of joy, eons of love, family and perfection. Gosh… how can He call them “light and momentary” when moms carry their babies for nine months, so big it hurts,  worrying about the diagnosis and then after a birth of being cut open spends weeks watching her little ones, too little, too weak, struggle to grow, breath and eat. If these things are “light” than the good, the pleasure of eternity must have no measure to its vast, glorious weight.  It must be that much better than our current sufferings that God calls the death of a child, father, loved one “light”. What a comparison. If death is “light” and heaven has an “eternal weight”  doesn’t that give us little hope? Doesn’t that give us a little joy?  So right now I’m in the pit, Jesus have your way, do your work, let your word separate my bones from my marrow (Heb 4:12), no matter how much it may hurt. God give me the faith to endure it.